{in honor of today – Day of Silence}
I speak not a word
for the word distracts you
from the reality we are the same
I walk into a store and am
turned away
because you do not serve my kind
I walk down the aisle
and I am arrested
because the constitution has no room
I am discovered
and dragged out and beaten
because my love is hated
I am vocal
and you see an agenda
instead of our sameness
so today
I speak not a word
So you can only do one thing
SEE ME as I AM
Equal.
I remember a day of silence. It was not a day of rememberance, nor a day of joy, nor a day of being brave, nor a day for courage. It was a day of silence – of no acknowledgement of my existance. And I remember it well.
A perceived slight at the hands of this geek
this braces wearing
band playing, A making
never popular
ever on the outside
set a off a fire storm
from every girl
in school.
Not a single one
lifted their eyes
lifted a hand
lifted a smile
lifted a word
for an entire day.
Not a single
girl, had a thing
to say
to me.
Save two
just outside of the
‘ones’ the perfected
the wealthy
the beautiful
the wanted
the non-hand-me-down
I get around
cheerleading
misleading
everyone seeing,
and everyone ‘loved’,
decided to shed
light and give
me a clue
to what was
happening
and why.
The crime?
was lingering
in the favor of the boy down
the street
who had taken a liking
to me;
we spoke
and broke every rule
of highschool love affairs
which clearly states
in everything but greek
an ex-lover can never
speak to a geek
and soon the speak
became a speck
a peck
a kiss
a lingering desire
and the world then
was set on fire
and they conspired to
make me pay
in the only
way possible
to not cause confusion
or retribrution
from the leadership
and the pastors
of churches
preachers, teachers
and mothers….
just
be
silent
don’t lift a word
to the satisfaction
of heard
don’t smile
or greet
not a hand shake
or eye to meet
her…
meet me.
And this day was just one
of many
but it is indellibly marked
upon memory
without fail or forgetfulness
I recall all their faces
sitting on benches and
taking their places
in the history of my mind
and I regret not
being strong enough to
fight back
to just stand up and not
care to failing to
find silence my friend
but in a school of less than 400
where everyone knows
everyone’s sister, brother,
father and mother
that is
not an easy feat for
a young teen to
complete
and though I confronted
I witted
wiled and wisely
wiggled out ever
word to stop the
day I heard
no sound
that day
will remain
as will the faces of the
season and her ‘cheer’sisters…
and the only good
that came of it
is I am determined
to not let it
happen again
to
you.
{{written in e.e.cummings style}}
Memory is more fragile than porcelain
more strong than granite’s soul
more stuck on repeat than mockingbird
more weightless then summer’s gold
it is maddeningly vivid and vivacious
and sanely it nevermore is
than all the stars flickering in violent
contraction are beautiful
Memory is less forever than rainbows
less forgetful than why
less remembered than sometimes
less hopeful than unhurt
It is always loud in soft places
and never quiet in traffic jams
or when all the night has
covered land, and see and eyes
Memory is tougher than hide
more weaker than shattered glass
and only when cats have tongues
will memory ever be unlast
Let’s draw it
trace the lines of
faces come undone
mix their visages
with rhyme
and time
to define
our dire
situation
in this
me-aification
all the same
world-nation
where voices
outside the dream
beg to live in
peace
but instead
are left for dead
at
defamation
fist filled inflamation
1 out of 4
intimidations
at the end of soles
black and blue
with the residue
of hate.
and every day
I think this
this has got to stop
how do we make it
stop
what words
will trace the lines
of the faces undone
so they are not
forgotten
what spit can be spun
what fist thrown unrung
will change
this….
and bring us back
to prismic solutions
absolutions of
fear
to a place where
9 out of 10 becomes
0 out of 10
and
160 thousand
don’t have to
stay in
where 2 to 9 times
more likely to die
becomes 10 times more
likely to stand up and fly
likely to stand up and fly
where 13 million hurting
becomes 13 million healing
and 25% giving less than 5%
turns into 100% of doing something
where every 7 minutes
turns from 7 mintues of tears
to 7 minutes of hear
ing something other than
the sound of another
kid being bulled
seriously…
are you following me?
this is not some
backyard do it yourself
statistics
this is unfortunately
very realistic
…
so
let’s draw it
trace the lines of
faces undone by
the unheard crys
and the
oppression of lies
mix their visages
with rhyme
and time
to define
our dire
situation
so the next generation
doesn’t have to.
Ghosts in the hallway
suck the life out of shadow
chill even marrow
through the bone
and caged heart of memory
but such is a life
to push through these
dreams called reality
and make a way
a peace
with
the Ghosts in the hallway
#OSP
I dream in black and white
save when I dream of you
then I dream in brilliant
shades of Canterbury blue.
saying it anyway 